Six months down the line but you still aren’t sure if he or she is the one for you? While you enjoy spending time with them, you aren’t sure, if you should give them a chance and take it to the next level or walkout when there is still time? Well, these insights might help you to an extent. The rest as they say, follow your heart!
You stick around if –
There is complete individuality in the relationship
Of course, you two love each other and can’t do without each other. However, your partner’s absence shouldn’t leave you or him or her disoriented. You should get on with your life just as fine. Only a sense of completeness as an individual could lead to a successful relationship. Otherwise, there is little chance for the relationship to survive. Hence, if you feel complete and at peace as an individual with your partner as much as without them, then you are at a happy place in your relationship. Yes, you’ll feel elated in the presence of your partner and one understands as much. These feelings ought to be reciprocated by your partner as well.
Your chats are downright dirty
If you haven’t reached a point where your replies are limited to monosyllables like “hmmm” or “k” then there is hope for you. If you still come up with interesting responses and keep chatting with each other all the time then you definitely need to stick out. Or let’s be honest, would you really want to give up that extremely interesting and sensuous texting or shall we say sexting? Oh, Let the love flow! There is a lot of hope for the two of you.
Treating each other right
If you are still nice to each other, respect each other’s choices and give each other enough space, you guys are more than good to go. For, by this time, if your partner was a jerk, s/he’d have no consideration for you, whatsoever. If s/he does, well, you have found a catch you shouldn’t be dropping yet. If your partner is being nice to you, you surely should give things a chance.
Nobody takes anyone for granted
This is very important. If you still have a say, if you are still respected and if you are still treated well, the relationship is on the right track. For, it is extremely common for couples to take each other for granted, six months down the road. It could be anything from a shabby appearance to a lousy tone of talking. By this time, you’d be in too much of an awe of them to notice the nuances. However, if any of this isn’t happening, say hurrah!
You can still feel the love
Irrespective of all the other things, if you don’t feel like you are in love with them, you really shouldn’t be wasting their time. However, if you do, then stick by. This is a basic and obvious thing but a lot of times, ignored. As surprising as it may sound, a lot of people, stick around together for the need of a relationship irrespective of whether they are in love or not. If the feeling of love isn’t present on both sides, you really ought to do everyone a favour and walk out.
You guys are awesome at sex
However much one may chose to ignore it, physical compatibility is important in a relationship. Hence, if you guys get along physically, it is a bonus point in your favour. Of course, sex isn’t the only thing that makes a relationship but hey, it is definitely one of the most important things.
That was about sticking around. Now, about not sticking around…this is a difficult decision but it is one that you absolutely should be making in any of the following cases. Though we hope that you aren’t going through any of these things, life is unpredictable. (No, we aren’t trying to sound like insurance agents)Alright then, down to business!
I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.
You shouldn’t stick around if –
You are having sex but it is getting frustrating and repetitive
If you aren’t addicted and hooked but quite the reverse then run with your tail between your legs before you get stuck. For, not only is it going to adversely affect your mental health, you are also going to feel emotionally drained out. While one maintains that sex is not the breaking point of a relationship, it is definitely one of the core values that exist in a relationship and if this one isn’t working out, then you should be walking out.
You are not treated right
Well, this is something that you definitely shouldn’t be tolerating. No matter how much you love the other person, you need to love yourself too. Hence, if your partner isn’t treating you right then you surely should be walking out. Here, by treating right, one doesn’t mean pampering. However, you should be treating respectfully at the level of individuality. This is of utmost importance in any relationship and it is above all. If there isn’t a basic respect for each other, then there isn’t a chance of survival for the relationship. In such scenarios, it is often difficult to walkoutbut once you have taken the courageous step, you shall feel liberated.
You are being ignored completely
If your partner never picks up your calls and never replies to your texts, then you should be walking out on them. All the more so, if he or she doesn’t show up after promising to meet. Why should you be tolerating such behaviour? Even if you love the person, your feelings aren’t being reciprocated and hence, you should walkoutof this rut as soon as you can. You sure are worth more than all of this.
Your partner is a jerk
Well, this one is an obvious red flag and doesn’t need any telling. Hence, you should absolutely and definitely walkoutof this. It is going to get you nowhere. If at all you stick around in spite of it, you will end up in a miserable relationship. Thus, it is best to walkoutwhen there is still time.
Some people are like magnets. They go together and nothing can stop them.
– Maitre’d Fred
Well, while the situations mentioned above are largely black and white, there are a few grey areas too. These are a few grey areas that deserve 6 more months before you put on your thinking cap and make a decision –
The relationship suddenly turned long distance
Well, not all long distance relationships fizzle out. The adage, “Distance makes the heart grow fonder” does hold true for some. Hence, why not give things a chance and see where it goes after a while. You know, in the age of technology, long distance relationships work.
Problems in the family
If you or your spouse have or might have problems in the family, it is surely scary but you can surely wait around if your partner is worth it. If you have stuck around all this long and there is no other problem, you probably will be slowly and gradually be able to sort this one out as well.
Problems with the Job
If your partner is jobless or has a problem with his or her boss or is offered a job in a different location, then these are practical problems and can be sorted out with some thought. It isn’t like you aren’t emotionally attached and it would be sad if you broke off because of a practical problem.
This is the worst reason to break off with anyone for. It is but natural to freak out but you need to stick it out and you will be calm in absolutely no time. A large number of people from all genders suffer from commitment phobia and while it is easy to give in to temptation, if you truly love your partner and want to give things a chance, stay back and after another 6 months, you probably may not feel so much panic.
So, she is a Hindu and you a Muslim? Well, you guys like each other and that doesn’t really matter. It isn’t like you had no idea about the other’s religion or culture when you started off with the relationship. Culture isn’t just about religion. Even 2 neighbours have a different culture and that definitely isn’t a reason for calling off a relationship.
Well, these need to be talked out and if after that there seems to be no relief in sight then you know what to do. It could be anything from your partner paying all your bills to your partner not paying any bills at all. This is an extremely sensitive issue and needs to be talked about. Always choose a nice and cosy setting when talking about this.
Lastly and most importantly, no matter where your relationship stands or what the issues are, follow your heart. It will not lead you onto wrong paths. Listen to your inner voice and you will know what to do.