Everything observed about the Leo/Libra relationship seems to fit my boyfriend and I. Although there is a situation at hand that I need serious help with. I can’t determine whether or not I’m happy with him anymore. This man was amazing when we started dating. The true essence of a Libra man with all the benefits: incredibly sexy, romantic, flattering, etc. Then there were some very unexpected twists.
He seems to be emotionally unstable. He has two extremes: excessively happy and then out of nowhere, terribly depressed. I’m very turned off by this instability. He seems to desire enormously great things in life, but he feels as though he needs to find a way to obtain these things with very minimal effort. These are the traits of a problem gambler, which he says he used to be before I met him. It seems they play into a lot of other parts of his life.
What bothers me about the way he treats me is that although he loves to compliment my looks and seems to really adore me physically, he doesn’t seem to want to hear anything I have to say about most subjects. I feel as though he doesn’t value my opinion. Which is disheartening because I relish meaningful conversation and mental connection. On occasions when he does listen to what I’m saying, it feels like he derives a strange pleasure from disagreeing with nearly everything I say, be it fact or opinion. I read that a Libra man loves to argue and debate, but my boyfriend does this so persistantly that I will not hear the end of a topic until he feels that he’s made me agree with him and say that I was wrong. He refuses to even disagree peacefully. Even if I just do something differently than he does, he feels the need to tell me I should be doing it the way he does it and then gives me his explanation as to why it’s better. This is a severe turn off for me, being a Leo, because I feel like he’s trying to control me and that’s something I really can’t stand.
Another problematic situation between us is that he’s a very selfish lover and he likes it that way. He knows he’s doing nothing to please me and he doesn’t feel bad at all. In fact he expresses that I should be doing even more for him than I already do. Every now and then he’ll give me just enough to be satisfied, but then he feels I should be content with that for a long time, and in the mean time make sure he’s always taken care of. Needless to say this is very frustrating for me.
Upon hearing these things, I’d imagine someone would ask if I’ve tried to communicate my discontent. Well yes I have tried. But he has a habit of tuning out anything negative about himself or his behaviour. It doesn’t matter how gingerly or tactfully I approach the subjects. As soon as I try to talk to him about anything serious, he’ll either immediately tell me what he things I need to hear to end the conversation, or blatantly tell me I’m complaining about trivial things and I should just drop it. Whener I try to open the communication lines, he hears it as complaining. I try to make it more like a mutual discussion but he won’t have it at all.
Some other things in short, are that he’s uncharacteristically jealous for a Libra. To the extent that I’m not allowed to so much as speak with other men unless there’s a direct reason for it (friends of family, store clerk, etc.) or else he’ll acuse me of having a crush on them. While he, on the flip side, is very flirty with other women. And being a Leo, I’m an extremely jealous woman, yet he expects me to keep quiet about it.
So one may ask why I’m even still wondering whether or not the relationship is worth saving. The answer is because despite these things he does that bother me, there are things I really love about him. Like the way he can be really romantic and affectionate. No man has ever given me as much affection as he has and I crave affection so badly. He thinks I’m beautiful and he says I’m smart although sometimes I wonder if he really thinks so. I’m just really confused. I’m at a loss when it comes to fixing these problems, but at the same time I’m not sure if I want to just give up or keep trying.
So my questions are for Leos or Libras or people who’ve had deep relationships with them, am I reading him totally wrong? Is it something about my personality causing me to feel these things? Is there something I can do to show him I don’t like to be controlled and that sometimes my opinioin can be valuable? Any other comments or insight you can offer will be greatly appreciated and deeply considered.